I woke up bright-eyed at 2am this morning, because my leg and knee were throbbing like a tweenage girls heart watching Bieber lip sync. Between pushing myself, my limits and the weather change I can barely walk. Yay for being a 28-year-old gimp! All the pain I has it; I’m resting today and listening to my achy injured body. I do learn eventually from my mistakes, I’m just a little slow and history has to repeat itself a few times.
In case you didn’t know, I’m an observer, it’s in my nature to always notice the people around me. (See also to mock those people, cause I’m a bitch. Again, at least I’m honest about who I am.) Anyways, yesterday I got stuck on a treadmill next to someone I dubbed Twitchy Face a few weeks back. Do you have any idea how hard it is for me to not focus on something once it has caught my attention? By the power of the Black Keys I lip synced my heart out making it extremely easy for someone to mock me to avoid staring at her. Don’t believe Jillian Michaels kids, surely I’m not the only asshole at the gym who observes, makes up nicknames and tweets about fellow members to pass the time on machines.
Speaking of observing, I’ve been trying nonchalantly to stare at this one pretty man’s everything the last few times we’ve been at the gym together. Well, we’ve made some eye contact, so I think we’re serious now in stalker terms. Okay, well maybe I’m more eye contact with a little junk check and he’s more boob contact. (Good sign he’s straight though!) And with this I will make sure that every Friday night at the gym in the future I wear the lowest cut top I own, while the fun bags are supported by Victoria’s Secret Very Sexy bras. Weight loss has done nasty things to the funbags and boob image is everything people, so I must perk them up proper. Did I mention he’s pretty and tall and he’s has some serious cardio abilities? All of this makes my overly sexual imagination fantasize a lot about hot, casual gym sex for hours involving him and his pretty everything.
