Getting fishy and drunk.
Seriously, fuck everything.
Booze.
An amazing burger with BBQ Mac n’Cheese topping.
Bitches.
Awful karaoke in the background. Bitch is trying to be the trainwreck Amy Winehouse, I can’t even.
Also, I needed this after another day when I fought the urge to say fuck it all.
Missing someone to pay my tab and sex. Maybe tomorrow night…
Sometimes I feel like an escort when an out of town dude is here for business or family and messages me, because they want to go out and have fun while they are in town. (Apparently my profile screams I’m a fun girl.)
Perks of these dudes include the usual drinks, dinner, and not being at home in my fat pants alone nose glued to Tumblr or Netflix. But, I also don’t have to worry about them getting clingy either, they do have to return to where they come from after all. I don’t even have to pretend to care about their story or the fake story I’m sure they’re telling me as they try to gauge me as to whether I’m a whore or just killing my boredom. (95% it’s boredom)
I should consider getting paid for my time now that I think about this. New job possibility so I can quit my current.
I’m about to go all deep and ambiguous, just how Tumblr likes it.
I just did something that currently makes me feel like a complete failure at life. Now, I’m on my way home to work on something to hopefully ensure that I won’t always feel like I’m failing at life. If this happens I might actually do something with my life for once.
Life is about balance, right?
Current Status: Red Velvet coffee and no vaahkaa, WHAT THE FUCK?!
GPOY errday!
(Source: nikiwith1k)
I need the juju fairies to shit their rainbow glitter luck all over me for once.
Just for fucking once.
I need a change so bad. I need to get out of my current situation before I do something really stupid, like run my mouth and get fired. I love my new manager, but I absolutely hate my new clients and direction my already shady company is heading.
Someone find me a job please.
1. The pollen is killing me right now. Seriously, it has my allergies to the level of horrible that I have an earache as well as affecting my upper and lower jaw on the same side since Thursday. It’s like a toothache for that entire side of my face, brutal and tear inducing on Friday. Pain pills and me are becoming one with each other, although I had to eat a shitty McDonald’s breakfast Saturday at work because the pain pills jacked my stomach all up. I fucking loathe McDonald’s.
2. I had an oyster for the first time last night, too salty for my taste, but I tried that slimey fucker and chased it with a shot of vaahkaa.
3. Russian’s aren’t the scariest white people after all. I actually had a good time last night filled with good conversations, a lot of laughs and a lot of vaahkaa shots. We were head to head with shots and I can out drink a Russian, I really do have superhuman drinking powers. I haven’t had a good time in a couple weeks, so I needed last night. I might still have a contact buzz happening today.
4. I had such a good time that my phone wasn’t glued to my hand, I forgot it existed. I try to behave on dates with my phone and not be rude, unless they are awful and then long hair don’t fucking care. Anyways 3 hours passed and I missed 43 messages and 3 phone calls and the emergency response system was issued. While I love that my friends were worried about me, I just don’t think the amount of time that passed was justified for the reaction I got, 3 hours isn’t very long, especially since I was on a date. I can understand the freak out I got if they didn’t hear from me by the next morning or if I had promised to text someone and failed.
5. I’m kind of bothered that the first thought was that something was terribly wrong rather than that maybe I was actually having fun. Why wasn’t it ever a possibility that I was having a good time? I know that most of my dates are lame as fuck, except in the story department, but I have went out with a couple dudes more that once, Licker is still around even. Good times do happen, sometimes.
6. When I was a kid me and my baby brother were the overprotected ones. My brother because he was the baby and me because some seriously traumatic shit happened to me in my early years, so my dad kept a tight reign on us and let my middle sisters do whatever they wanted. I seldomly was allowed to go out with friends unless he knew the parents and the friend. (I had to pull some quick shit in high school to go to games and get into the little bit of trouble I did get into my freshman year.) When I started driving I was given a cell phone and had to report when I made it somewhere and when I was heading home. This mentality was drilled into me, so even in my early 20’s when I’d go out to a concert I was reporting back to dad my whereabouts. After he passed I was still doing it, but to my mother. One day I came home and she told me that I am an adult and I don’t have to report to her what and where I am, but if I wasn’t coming home to show the respect of letting her know. I didn’t even realize what I was doing until that moment and it was a habit that took me awhile to break. I’ve grown to be very independent the last 3 years, I don’t answer to anyone any longer and because I’m single I don’t feel I have to. I hate that I was made to feel like an incompetent child that needs babysitting or monitoring so she doesn’t get herself into trouble, because I didn’t respond to texts for 3 hours.
7. I think I made out with Olivia’s pillows last night and gave my chin rug burn.
When all else fails you raid your mothers happy pills, go to Google and then self medicate.
I was just propositioned by a married couple to screw the husband while the wife watches.
I am getting some awesome stories to add to my growing list of unbelieveable shit that has happened to me for my geriatric years.
I’d rather have this interesting and weird shit happen than a boring mundane life, even if I won’t be doing this. (Okay, maybe if he agrees to lights off Spanx on I might do it.)
I came to work this morning looking like a cheap crack whore and as the hours pass the more I’m okay with this decision.
I had someone ask me if I’d trample him today. My response, Is this because I’m a fatty? Apparently not, just his fetish. Sorry bro, maybe a golden shower but not this, freak show.
I’m off the vaahkaa again for a bit. Day one was okay, but today I have the shakes and bitchiness.
I have like a month before I see my assholes again, I might become a decent person in that time.
I really need like a week of sleep and some serious pain meds for the headache I’ve been blessed with since I woke up yesterday.
I have that awful feeling that something bad is coming, I don’t think it’s my period either. My gut is a freak.
This post was written by me and not my guest blogger.