I wonder if I hide the look of creeped out when a random customer approaches me and mentions how I’m not wearing a skirt and tall boots today. Seriously, it’s been a couple weeks. I know this because I’ve only wore a skirt/boot combo one day since boot season resumed, because everything in my body decided to freeze like its winter rather than autumn.
I feel like bitching people out today.
Truthful Tuesday: That Funky Monkey
So, last night hippie hipster insisted we drink Brass Monkey’s because of how I haven’t had one when I’m all about bitch beer aka crap. I don’t know what was worse, the taste or driving around trying to find the best malt liquor according to him, Mickeys, and failing. They’re apparently worlds better with Mickeys and not King Cobra… I highly doubt.
I’ve been spending a lot of time with hippie hipster, I still only have the friend vibe towards him, but I’m comfortable around him, we have a lot of similar interests and we have a lot of laughs together. If only I had the lust factor, it might be because I’m showered with attention when I’m with him and it feels super easy to me. Props to me though for still actually trying to give him a chance when I never seem to give one. Which makes me kind of wonder if it’s because I seriously wouldn’t mind him being a friend in my life compared to others where I’m all let’s not talk again.
Went to see the therapist yesterday, first time since right before my car accident in August. When I gave her a rundown of everything that has happened since I last saw her, her jaw dropped. She stared in disbelief, so I in typical Amanda fashion made a joke; My life makes everyone thankful theirs is better, at least my life from May until September. She straight up told me she doesn’t even know how to properly respond to what all I told her, except that she’s sorry it all has happened. Oh and she wants to see me every two weeks instead of the monthly visits we use to have.
I want egg rolls, but the Chinese place won’t deliver with a $4 order, bastards.
Out of Nowhere
I’m pretty sure something great just might have fell in my lap. I wasn’t looking for it, but it came to me and I think it could be a very good thing.
I’ll have another huge change in my life, but I’ll have more options, more available time to spare for a social life and most importantly my schooling.
I’ll know more in a few weeks, but I can’t help but think maybe I’m getting a break.
"You Make Me Happy"
And then I wanted to throw up. Too soon and holy fuck he’s WAY serious. All of his actions back this statement up too and that’s even more scary to me. Plus, he won’t quit blowing my phone up wanting more time with me. “When am I going to see you again?” Last night he even suggested I request off a night in the near future so I wouldn’t have to leave early for work and we could spend the entire day together. Last week when he mentioned going to the phone company and I jokingly told him to do something for me and motherfuck, he did, I had forgot that I joked about it until he sent me a message with my answer. We’ve spent maybe a total of 24 hours together between our couple dates, surely I’m not the only one going, seriously? I’m trying really hard not to make a mangina comment.He really is a good guy and I don’t mind hanging around him, but goddamn I have issues and I’m not the girl who jumps on this kind of behavior. I’m the girl who is all whoa, who is the bitch here? I’m also the girl who freaks out and does bad, amazing and fun things to kind of distract, but holy fuck I can’t get enough of this bad thing. I think I said a month or so ago that I was going to give a good dude on paper a chance if I could stand him in most capacities, so that’s what I’m going to do, just not at his pace. I’m doing this as an experiment to see if I’m capable of giving a guy a chance for more pretty much.
My body seriously hates me and my medication increase, so it’s making normal things never end. MAKE IT STOP!
I’m going on date number two with hippie hipster Ashton tomorrow night, he’s taking me to a fancy wine bar inside of an old bank vault. I already told him wine is too fancy for me; I should bring my flask. Holy fuck my chubby ass approves of the food menu. Foodie for lyfe or fatty for lyfe, either/or.
I jokingly told someone Saturday that September was the month of married men for me and October is shaping up to be the month of foot fetish men. But then this morning, two married men from last month messaged me. Also, I find it HILARIOUS how the message always starts the same, how’s it going? I mean seriously that’s not why you’re messaging. It sucks the one is married though, he was a lot of fucking fun. Pun intended.
I think the universe is playing a cruel joke on me, because all the best sex comes from the unavailable men, who happen to also be geeks. They’re either a headcase, commitment phobic, or married. LOLSOB, true story.
I got invited to party in Columbus Saturday night and I’m gonna go get my trainwreck on. After last week I really fucking deserve it.
So, my dating profile has nothing sexual in it. It doesn’t say anywhere that I work at an adult store. It doesn’t even have pictures of my feet, but yet again today I received another dude message asking if he could worship my feet while I humiliate him for his small penis for money.
Maybe the unfiltered selfies, as well as unflattering pics my friends have taken of me that I have up says, well she gives zero fucks and isn’t out to be fake, so let’s get right to the point in the first message.
I’m just kind of shocked over this, I sell way more Tabu/incest porn then I do foot worship in this area. It takes a lot to shock me too.
October, Fuck Yeah!
🔮 It’s officially a new month and all I can say is THANK FUCK!
👻 Ashton Doppelgänger literally just asked me out already for a second date. He promised me more vodka, I said yes.
🎃 I have a dude willing to pay me $150 to shoot some foot fetish video with him. All he wants me to do is shove my feet all sweaty up in his face as I record it. Today he asked that I send him pics of me feet, my feet in socks and pics of shoes. BTW, this all came about last night when he sent me a message on the dating site that was a decent message, but ended with what size shoe do I wear. My boredom and wanting to fuck with people might have landed me easy bill money for October.
👹 I really want my own reality television show. I think my life is unique and interesting and I’m sure I can entertain the masses with the shit that happens to me.
Saving Grace Of The Week
I think I just went out with the doppelgänger of Ashton Kutcher if he decided to try and be a hipster hippie crossbreed.
As the night went on and the convo didn’t stagnate, I decided that I need to give the dude another chance. I had fun, the lust wasn’t there, but never know. I’m not use to dudes with more than scruff as facial hair though or dudes who would love to go all McCandless, without the eating the poison berry part. Another complete opposite of me, but at least he isn’t married.
I do like that the top of my head sits below his chin and that he was a decent distraction, the not being married part is tits, too. I’m gonna break that pattern.
Just remember, even your worst days only have twenty-four hours
It’s always nice to find out that your mom is contacting everyone, but you.
How she ignores your phone calls, but calls the others from the very number you call.
It would be nice to get a… hi, I’m sorry that I completely fucked you over, once again, but I only do it because I know you’re strong and smart enough to eventually fix me fucking up your life a little more.
Maybe I’m nonexistent now, especially since she has a new boyfriend in Georgia. Maybe if she doesn’t talk to me she won’t have to hear the struggles she has put on me. Maybe she truly doesn’t even care.